March 4, 2021
by Melanie Reed
At the start of 2021, I set an intention that reflected how I was going to show up in the world. It boiled down to one word, Focus. I set this intention because it aligned with my values and it supported the goals I want to accomplish in 2021.
As I live this intention each and every day and I reflect on the progress I am making I have come to realize that there is another critical element that drives success; boundary setting. Setting boundaries is important for anyone to be successful, but even more so for people like me (and likely many of you) who enjoy helping and supporting others. In this episode, I share my thoughts on why setting boundaries is critical to career and life success and how you can tell if you need to set a boundary with someone or something in your life.
Here is a summary of the episode:
- [02:26] - "Time and money are renewable resources." This was a quote from a course I was taking and it made me rethink my relationship with time and busyness as well as who and what I spend my time on. This sparked my realization that boundaries are a key practice for career and life success.
- [03:44] - Three parts of your life improve with clear boundaries; time, energy and respect (for ourselves and from other people.)
- [04:47] - You have the same 24 hours as anyone else on the planet. You create more time by setting boundaries and being more critical of how you spend your time. Sometimes this means you have to say no to people and activities.
- [08:34] - Setting boundaries to protect your energy comes down to choosing people and activities that boost your energy as opposed to draining it.
- [10:39] - The third part of your life that improves with boundaries is respect. Respect for yourself and respect from others.
- [16:13] - Although determining you need to set a boundary is a bit of an individual experience I have come up with six questions you can ask yourself to see if you need to set a boundary with someone or an activity.
- Are you spending time doing things that don’t align with your values?
- Are spending time doing things that don’t align with your goals?
- Do you feel frustrated, angry, annoyed, resentful or disappointed when you are engaged in this activity or with this person?
- Do you feel drained and lacking energy when engaged in this activity or with this person?
- Are spending time doing a lot of things for free?
- Are you struggling with decision making and do your decisions focus more on how they will impact others rather than how they will impact you?
- [23:30] - To recap, I believe there are three key reasons to set boundaries; time, energy and respect. Even though boundary setting is challenging, taking small steps to make these changes will help you feel more energized and fulfilled.
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